Moral of Medical Jokes --> Good For Exam Motivation

6:41 AM 13 Comments A+ a-

Assalamualaikum...
Exam lagi 4 hari. Dah mula cuak semacam. Baca banyak kali pun bila rasa takut, mulalah nak blank. Haish.. Takpe2, keep going on~ Buat yang terbaik.. Balik dari library tadi, ingat nak stop kejap baca buku, cara release tension macam biasa lah - jalan-jalan internet.. Dan kali ni, terberhenti dekat doctor's jokes~ Best untuk gelak-gelak lepas tension. Have fun!



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Mechanic v Doctor Story

Allan, a mechanic, was removing a cylinder head from a Harley-Davidson motorbike, when he spotted a world-famous heart surgeon in his garage. The heart surgeon was waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.

Allan shouted across the garage, 'Hey Doc can I ask you a question?' The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to Allan. Allan straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, 'So Doc, look at this engine. I also can open hearts, take valves out, fix 'em, put in new parts and when I finish this will work just like a new one. So how come I work for a pittance and you get the really big money, when you and I are doing basically the same work?'

The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over and whispered in Allan's ear, 'Try doing it with the engine running.'

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Keep Taking the Medicine

Patient: It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable.
Doctor: Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you?
Patient: I sure did - the bottle said 'keep tightly closed.'


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Quick Diagnosis

Nurse: 'Doctor, Doctor the man you've just treated collapsed on the front step. What should I do?'
Doctor: 'Turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving!'


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Eating Disorder

A mother complained to her doctor about her daughter's strange eating habits. 'All day long she lies in bed and eats yeast and car wax. What will happen to her?'
'Eventually,' said the Doctor, 'she will rise and shine.'


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Beware of Your Doctor Uttering These Phrases During/after Surgery

1.Oops!
2.Has anyone seen my watch?
3.Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
4.Well this book doesn't say that... What edition is your manual?
5.OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
6.Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
7.Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
8.Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie
9.If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week.
10.Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
11.Damn, there go the lights again...
12.Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em.
13.Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
14.Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off.
15.I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
16.Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
17.Steril, shcmeril. The floor's clean, right?
18.What do you mean, he's not insured?
19.This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
20.Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
21.Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
22.That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that?
23.I don't know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice.
24.Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he's still moving.
25.Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?
26.Of course I've performed this operation before, Nurse!
27."Blink once for 'yes'".
28."What do you mean we have the wrong patient?"
29."Why is there a tag on his toe?"
30."Do you think he can hear us?"
31."I didn't even know a human could bend that way."
32."I'm sorry, we must not have used enough anesthesia. Just relax now. We'll be done in a jiffy."
33."Hold the patient still, we've almost pried it open."
34."Nurse, make sure you're getting all this down. It'll make a great 'ER' script."
35.FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!


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Funny Doctor's Advice

The best doctor in the world is the veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter-he's got to just know.
Will Rogers

A man walked into the doctor's, The doctor said 'I haven't seen you in a long time'
The man replied, 'I know I've been ill'
Tommy Cooper

Patient: 'And if I take these little green pills exactly as you suggested, will I get better?'
Doctor: 'Well, let's put it this way - none of my patients has ever come back for more of those pills.'


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Medical Term Needed

The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do.

When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me."

"Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."

"OK," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."


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MOral Of The Story : Study Hard and Smart! - Don't be a ridiculous doctor~

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* Dalam facebook tadi, ternampak status sorang kawan (medical student) :

"400 pages of anatomy,100 pages of embryology,1 lecture on glands (???)-absorb in 1 month.kalau ada org sue aku tym practise nanti,aku tempeleng dia.heh :p"

--> Hahaha, what else can i say? That is a life of medical student~ Fighting!! ^^,

13 comments

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Fez
AUTHOR
January 10, 2010 at 9:14 AM delete

They made me smile..:)

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Rie
AUTHOR
January 10, 2010 at 9:58 AM delete

Huhu.. entri ni best =)

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kher
AUTHOR
January 10, 2010 at 10:42 AM delete

Haha..

nicely put.
go back to your study.
Bittaufiq wa najjah.

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ron ron~
AUTHOR
January 10, 2010 at 4:18 PM delete

haha lawak la kak ainul

aarghh mmg penat baca anat yang belambaak

all d best kak ainul utk exam =)
harap kita sama2 la dapat jawab exam nti pastu jadi a good doctor ( n not the ridiculous one) =D

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IRIS
AUTHOR
January 10, 2010 at 10:01 PM delete

Salam Ainul,

All the best ok.

Aminnn

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January 10, 2010 at 10:06 PM delete

1st joke really made my day. no wonder i aint became a doc. I was always shutting down the things before fixing it aftermath.

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arina
AUTHOR
January 10, 2010 at 10:41 PM delete

hahahaha. aduh bibir aku pecah xleh ketawe banyk2 .. (-_-!)

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[sakuradila]
AUTHOR
January 11, 2010 at 7:08 AM delete

gudluck kak ainul!
moga Allah mengiringi~~

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MaUt
AUTHOR
January 15, 2010 at 11:19 PM delete

ainu, best la lawak ni..terutama yang 1st tu..gelak tapi kagum la ngan surgeon..memang hebat kalau fix on running engine hehe

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hikari
AUTHOR
January 16, 2010 at 10:56 AM delete

salam.
heheh kak nor pon nk exam gak nih.
sonok2 baca jokes ni.
ilang skit tense.hihi

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January 17, 2010 at 6:46 AM delete

kak faezah:
they made the rolling on the floor laughing~ ;p

rie:
lawak kan? kind of ntah hapa-hapa. bengong pun ada jugak.

senior kher:
hehe.. yes senior! thank you~

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January 17, 2010 at 6:50 AM delete

ron ron~:
haha, we are in the same shoes la kan? good luck to you too, nija. all the best!

IRIS:
thanks akak! doakan saya ya~

chiam:
haha... nearly forgot that you ARE a engineer. so, it's true? i see...

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January 17, 2010 at 6:53 AM delete

arina:
gelaklah sambil tutup mulut! (>_<) hehe...

dila:
thanks dear~ all the best to you too..

kak farah:
betul3.. ada banyak lagi akak lawak bengong-bengong medik-medik nih.. penat saya baca sambil gelak aritu. ;p

kak nor:
iye? good luck kak nor! rasanya kan akak, kalau lawak ni dibuat dalam bentuk kartun akak, mesti lagi umpphh!! ;D

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